Luke’s Dark Day

I am a Gilmore Girls fan through and through. I have seen every episode over 100 times and could pretty much repeat them line for line. One of the episodes deals with Luke, one of the main characters, and his mysterious ‘dark day’. On November 30th of every year he gets into a funk. He doesn’t answer his phone and closes the diner that he owns. It is later discovered that this dark day is the anniversary of his fathers death. While I know that these are fictional television characters I have always felt an odd connection with each of them. I, like Luke, have a dark day. Unfortunately, that dark day was yesterday.

I lost my dad 4 years ago and it weighs heavy on my heart every day of my life. This is a very old picture of him and I that has been distorted and discolored over time. But it makes it that much better if you ask me.

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He was a great person with a huge heart. I try to stay positive, although it is hard at times, but I know that a little piece of me died with him. My wedding was probably one of the most difficult days not having him there with me to walk me down the aisle or dance with me (both things he was very much looking forward to doing)

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He was a paramedic and the county named the new hall after him after he passed away. Such a great way to memorialize him and the work he did so passionately.

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He is my main inspiration for going to grad school and pushes me to stay positive when it’s the last thing I want to do. At my college graduation he gave me a hug and, with tears in his eyes, told me how very proud he was of me. I have lived every single day after that trying to make him proud.

I survived the day with help from the people who love me and I am so grateful for them and how much they care.

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This was from my work bfs. Now everyone can know I’m a crazy cat lady. 😉

My husband always knows how to cheer me up and since it was so nice out he had the brilliant idea to try out our kayaks!

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This ‘pond’ (although it seems much bigger than a pond) is right down the road from our house, so it was perfect. We spent about an hour out on the water getting comfortable on the kayaks. It was so much fun and now I cannot wait for summer and paddling around the mitten!

My calves have been killing me, so foam roll Friday was in full affect.

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My poor legs haven’t seen sunlight in far too long. At least I remembered to shave!

I’m so glad that my dark day is over. I think about my dad every minute of every day, but the few days leading up to 4/11 are just so much more mentally and emotionally draining than I can take sometimes. I’m looking forward to being able to focus on school, health and fitness again without feeling like I have a huge weight on my chest.

Love you, Daddy!

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